SDH 003: Listen More, Talk Less with Natalie Alexia
Natalie is an author, speaker, blogger and life coach. She has been coaching on the side while working in her and her husband’s landscaping business for the past 9 years. She has lived in 6 different countries throughout her life and has recently sold the landscaping business and relocated with her family to sunny California. Their newest business endeavor is full-time business and life coaching via the website and future blog, LifeLetLoose.com. Natalie's coaching info is at NatalieAlexia.com and hop on over to Love's The New Black to learn about her newest photographic project!
“My dad is an entrepreneur so it just kind of always seemed like a really logical choice.”
Breakthrough Goal: Selling their business in 2013 and moving to the states. :: More on why this is important, below
Insight into Coaching and Consulting: “some of us are just innately coaches, in life, in general. I’ve always been that go-to person within my circle of friends and family where if someone had an issue or something had come up in their business, I’ve always been the person that they called. I’m very level-headed, I’m very direct but without being very brutal. That was very much a part of my personality, always has been.”
Getting Started: Started as a passion project – Sending out emails to her network and do a certain amount of hours to fulfill her certification. Used referral strategies to build client base. “I maintained as many clients as I wanted because I didn’t want a full practice throughout those 6 years.”
“For me, I wanted it to be more than coaching. I love the one-to-one coaching, but I was looking around and seeing so many people in my life who were not really fully living or enjoying”
Coaching | Working with startups and entrepreneurs | Developing online products | Virtual coaching products coming out next year | Starting a podcast | Blog | Full-day workshops
Provides material that will help transform people’s lives in terms of feeling more confident and happier, increasing profitability in their businesses and being clear about what they want and obtaining some really massive goals.
“It was a slow build, little by little, creating the content, getting out there and building the audience”
SDIHW Advice Nugget: Having patience while still moving 100 MPH. To get things to move forward you have to execute faster.
The overwhelming commonality between all the women she coached around the dating issue was that they really weren’t very nice to themselves. Traits of a high-performing individual tend to be high-action, high-attachment. Reaching goals and moving in a very methodical, strategic way through things.
People who achieve tend to be pretty hard on themselves. Not wanting to move back into that space of vulnerability and a place where there was a lack of success in their lives, it was also that every time something didn’t go as they wanted, the self-depreciation was significant.
“As a coach you’re pushing people outside of their comfort zones, asking them to work on the areas of their life that they find challenging, putting more strategy into it, but massively building confidence too and helping them to recognize [their worth]. Supporting them in owning that and being more strategic about their personal lives.”
Awareness Exercise: Bringing awareness to your self-talk. What is the voice in your head saying when something doesn’t go right? What is the tone of voice, language it’s using, does it sound like you, does it sound like someone else? Just bring awareness to how kind or unkind you are being to yourself.
“Awareness is the cornerstone to change”
Limiting Beliefs: A thought that comes from some kind of conditioning or something you have experienced in your life and it is now limiting to you. “They are things that we have that we’re probably not consciously aware of that are obstacles in achieving our outcomes or objectives.”
Limiting Beliefs in Business: People often have ceilings on finances. They only see themselves worth one certain amount or how successful they can be in any form. Limiting beliefs can be…
How successful you can be
How much money you can make
What kind of business you can have
Who you can partner with
“Inevitably, if someone isn’t achieving the results they want in their life it’s because something, usually themselves, is standing in their way.”
Pealing back the layers of an onion – What is stopping you from doing this thing that you want to achieve? A feeling or an emotion – where is it that that feeling or emotion comes from?
EFT: Emotional Freedom Technique. A therapy where you tap on all the acupressure points. Use it to work with limiting beliefs or blocks or things that you’re struggling with. :: Amanda has never heard of it before, but another one of us has! Here is a link to the EFT Tapping Solution Podcast (yes, there’s a podcast for that!) We highly suggest Episode 1 with Wayne Dyer, someone we like to quote as much as Kanye West likes to quote Kanye West.
Goal Advising: Working with a breakthrough goal -- There is one goal that if you achieve that one thing, so many of the other things would be ticked off by default. Look at it as a breakthrough goal.
“Leaving yourself open to the possibility that something even better could happen.”
Crystalizing one objective into a breakthrough goal can help you become focused, take action, and quickly create momentum.
Maintain Focus: Have goals [always have a breakthrough goal] and keep the biggest thing very present in your mind. Have it on the wall, as a screensaver in your phone, and take consistent action every day to achieve that one thing.
Work with a coach // Work with a mastermind // Have an accountability partner
To not have FOMO: “[the breakthrough goal] has to be something so exciting and a little bit scary that’s pulling you towards it”
Must Read(s): "The Success Principles" - Jack Canfield How to get from where you are to where you want to be.
“How to win Friends and Influence People” – Dale Carnegie “Everyone should have to read that book”
“For me, if we could all listen a bit more and talk a bit less, the world would be a happier place”